Ravissant
by momentofbored
Summary: On the night of Bella's 30th birthday, Edward unexpectedly returns. The next thing she knows she's undercover with the Volturi... B/E, B/J
1. Wine

_I have always sort of wondered- what if Edward didn't come back at the end of New Moon? I know this idea has been played with a lot already, I will try to keep it original, I promise._

_This story will be Jacob-heavy, at least initially, but make no mistake about it- I love Jacob, and will not be bashing him or forgetting him, but I am a Bella/Edward diehard, no worries._

Chapter One- Rim of the Wineglass

"Jake, where the hell are the car keys?" I call up the stairs, hearing more than a hint of annoyance in my own voice but unable to help it as I sweep the clutter on the kitchen table first one way, then the other, rolling my eyes in frustration as the gesture yields nothing but an even bigger mess.

To my horror, two year old Elise giggles from where I have her perched on my hip, repeating "H-well!" with great enthusiasm, if not pronunciation, and I feel something resembling panic at how quickly she's growing up as Jake shouts,

"Did you check my coat?" his voice sounding far away.

I take a few steps over to the front hall and begin to fumble through the front pockets, not feeling especially optimistic, but I hear a telltale jingle almost immediately and am unable to resist twirling Elise around once before I shout again, "Yeah, I've got them!"

"Good, Bels," he responds, almost absently, or at least, I think it's absently, since it's kind of hard to tell when he's one floor and several rooms away from me, but before I can think about it too much I hear him coming down the stairs, dragging a very reluctant Conner behind him and muttering something in a voice that is almost threatening about how Conner had better behave on my birthday.

But evidently Conner has no qualms about making his unhappiness known as he plants his feet at the foot of the stairs, hands on his hips as he whines, "But I don't want to see grandma. She's scary!"

I look down at his five year old frame, trying not to laugh at the idea of anyone finding Renee _scary _when if anything I think of her as a child myself, and am struck by how Conner really does look like Jacob in his current pose of defiance-

I look up at Jake, and see that unlike me he's given into the urge to laugh at our son's words, something Conner doesn't seem to be taking especially well as he sticks his chin out with all the dignity his five year old frame can muster.

"She _is_ scary," he insists loudly, eyes widening. "Last time, she tried to tell me about tar- taroo" he said, and I fight the urge to laugh again as I correct,

"Tarot," smiling at him lightly before sinking to my knees to face him and asking, "But how come that was scary?"

"The death card was so _creepy_," he said, as though it was perfectly obvious, and I felt the corners of my mouth pull up a little bit more as I said with manufactured gravity,

"Well, she won't talk about that anymore today, I promise. And anyway, don't you want to see Grandpa Charlie?"

"'rampa Charlie is coming?" he asked, sudden excitement in his voice, and I smile again as Jake replies,

"Sure is. And so is your Grandpa Billy. Don't you want to see him?"

By now, of course, Conner is in a near frenzy, jumping up and down and clapping his hands as he exclaims loudly, "'rampa Billy! 'rampa Billy!"

Jake picks him up and smiles at me over his head, and even after all this time I'm awed by the gentleness in his gaze as he reaches his free hand toward me, his arm warm as it snakes gently around my waist and he whispers in my ear, "Better go quickly before he changes his mind."

Despite myself a small giggle escapes my lips as we walk toward the car.

--

I run a finger carelessly over the rim of my wineglass, feeling the moisture on the tip of my finger for a brief moment as I hesitate, unsure of what to do- somehow it seems inappropriate for a thirty year old mother of two to lift her finger to her lips to suck it off, and yet, wiping it in a napkin would feel so- unsatisfactory somehow-

"Bella?" my father's voice calls me back to the present, and I blink in surprise as he places a gift in front of me.

"Just a little thing," he says, looking slightly embarrassed, and I try to smile warmly as I take it, not sure how successful I am, and I open it, my thoughts a million miles away, thinking about things that I'm totally over, most of the time.

But for some reason, even after all these years, birthdays are hard.

"Oh wow, dad, thank you," I say warmly, not needing to fake my enthusiasm as I see the gift- a picture frame containing a picture of him, Jake, and I from what must be over 10 years ago now- before Jake and I were married. We're sitting on the back porch of Charlie's house, and we all look- not even happy, exactly, but at peace.

And I guess that's one thing I need to say about my life- it has all been very peaceful, very natural, werewolves notwithstanding. And if I sometimes wish for more, well- doesn't everyone, in their own way? I think so. But like I already said, birthdays are harder. Usually I'm glad that I came back to Forks after college; usually I'm happy with my life. But somehow, as time ticks by, on this one day a year I'm somehow acutely aware of other possibilities that never came into existence- other realities that might have been. I think of Alice- how she sometimes saw many possible futures-

But it's never a good idea, to think of Alice, so I stop that train of thought before it gets any further and turn to my mother's gift.

--

I slip outside, hoping no one will notice, even as I know that there wouldn't be much chance of that on the best of days, but much less on the night of my birthday. In fact, by my calculations, I have ninety seconds maximum before Renee comes looking for me, trying to make me open just one more present, or have just one more bite of cake.

As I look toward the woods I'm struck once more by the peacefulness of the night- the feeling of casual certainty that comes from being here, back at Charlie's house to celebrate my thirtieth birthday. It seem suddenly, strangely appropriate, and I feel an inexplicable sense of homecoming even though Jacob and I only live ten minutes away-

And in one sudden moment, a moment that doesn't seem inherently different than any other moment, that feeling is irrevocably shot to hell as I feel, rather than see, a sudden movement somewhere to my left. I'm instantly on edge, shivering despite the unusual warmth of the night as I turn my head in the direction of the movement, asking uncertainly,

"Who's there?" then regretting the words almost immediately, since I've learned, after all this time, that when you ask that question you don't always like the answer.

But tonight there is no answer, and I shiver again, moving to go down the porch steps and, of course, tripping slightly as I do, the years having done nothing to grant me anything resembling… well, balance, and I let out a low curse word, instantly wishing I had done neither thing as I realize that if anything I'm probably making myself into a victim. For an endless second two parts of me argue loudly with one another in my head- the sensible part that tells me to turn around and bolt back toward the house, to my family, and part that urges me to push forward- the part that I know, even before either side has been able to make a single point in my head, will win.

Various possibilities race through my head as I take one slow step forward and then another, somehow more confident as I say again, louder than the first time, "Who's there?" absolutely certain, despite the fact that all I can hear are crickets, that someone _is _there, and various possibilities race quickly through my head and are just as quickly discarded as I take another step.

"Bella," two voices say at once, and I am sure, despite the fact that one of the voices belongs to Jacob and all but drowns out the second, which is a mere whisper, almost too soft for my ears to catch it, that there ARE two voices, and without even thinking, almost unable to help myself, I take a step toward the second one, even though I'm not even sure where it came from- wishing I could hear it again to be sure-

"Bella?" I hear again from behind me and somehow, Jake's saying my name again breaks the bizarre spell that's come over me and I turn quickly, almost flying into his arms as I sprint back toward the porch, miraculously managing not to trip this time.

He laughs warmly but uncertainly as I cling to him, stroking my hair gently, in a way he hasn't done since we were much younger- in a way that suddenly makes me _feel_ much younger as he asks, "What are you doing out here?"

"I- wanted to be alone for a little bit," I respond honestly, and feel his understanding as he asks seriously,

"Would you like me to go back inside for a while then?"

I hesitate before clinging to him slightly tighter, saying softly, "No, Jake, I wouldn't."

He pushes me back slightly, surveying my face closely, but either he can't see anything or isn't sure what he sees, as his own face remains, if anything, slightly bewildered.

"You okay, Bels?" he asks finally, voice laced with concern, and I fight to smile as I say what I hope is brightly, wishing I was a better liar,

"Yeah, I am."

But the thing is- I'm not. Because for a minute there, I would have sworn the other voice that I heard was Edward's.

--

_I hope you enjoyed it!!! Reviews are treasured, and another chapter should be up soon!_


	2. Aversion

Chapter Two- Aversion

Jacob, of course, doesn't believe me, since, as usual, my face gives it all away, but I can read his face by now, too, and I briefly wonder if he's going to press the issue or not. His brow furrows slightly and then he takes a deep breath and I know.

"You don't look fine, Bels," he says bluntly, and I feel myself flush, glad that, at the very least, he won't see that in the dim porch light. I look down, contemplating the best way to respond without either lying or bringing up things I would need to be insane to bring up- things I must be _insane_ to be thinking to begin with.

"No, I'm fine," I insist, but my voice sounds hollow even to my own ears, so I can't even imagine how it must sound to him. At his extremely doubtful look I feel myself grow redder before I amend, "I mean, it's silly. I just- thought I heard something out there."

His expression changes again, hovers between concern and amusement: "So you decided to go check it out yourself?" he asks, amusement winning as he breaks into a grin. "Good plan," he snorts good-naturedly, and I feel his mood start to rub off on me as I playfully elbow him, shooting back indignantly,

"I can take care of myself, you know!"

"Of course you can," he agrees just a little too cheerfully; and though I can tell he does mean it; I brace myself for some crack about my coordination, wishing I had something to counter with… but the fact that he's a werewolf sort of prevents me from gaining the high ground in this particular fight. "I was just wondering how your knees would feel after you ran into-"

A branch cracks and falls a few yards from us, and Jacob suddenly stops talking, and he must feel or smell something in addition to what we both heard, since he's suddenly gripping my upper arms tightly and putting me gently away from him.

"Jake?" I question, afraid I already know the answer even though I'm not even sure exactly what I'm asking.

"Bella, go inside," he says shortly, and I feel suddenly concerned for him as I retort,

"No, I'll come check it out with you."

He looks at me for a moment as though uncertain whether I'm joking or not before he hisses, "It's not human, Bella."

Somehow to hear him say it is surprising even as it confirms what I somehow already know, and I allow myself a moment of self-directed scorn for thinking it might have been Edward _Cullen_ of all people.

But somehow the rational thoughts going through my head aren't coming out of my mouth in any kind of way that makes sense as I grab his arm, blurting,

"Can't we just go home, Jake?"

He blinks at me in what can only be surprise before reaching out a hand to caress my cheek and saying carefully, gently, "Of course you can take the kids home if you want to, but I need to stay here and figure out what's going on."

But the goosebumps on my arm are already lifting and I know somehow, instinctually, that Jacob has already waited too long and won't find what he's looking for tonight- that whoever or whatever it was is already far from here-

And though I can't explain why- or maybe; if I'm truthful, can't _admit_ why; not even to myself, I'm glad as I walk back inside and start to get the kids ready to go.

--

_And thus ends Chapter Two. I know it is a short one, but Chapter Three is going to be super long and have massive Edward action!_

_Reviews are awesome and inspiring! Thanks so much to those who have reviewed already- you made my day! Also, honestly, if I don't get any reviews now I might not continue, since really, if people aren't enjoying this I'd rather put my energy toward something that you'll all like better, you know?(I'm honestly not trying to guilt trip people for reviews, I just really would love some honest feedback at this juncture.)_

_Thank you SO much for reading!!!_


	3. Unloaded

I know, absolutely, that I am going insane. It is the only possible explanation for how on edge I've felt over the past few days- as though something is going to pop out of the shadows at any moment and get me.

But the even bigger sign that I am losing it is that I _want_ something to happen- want this badly, even without knowing exactly what I mean or why.

But there are no shadows in my brightly lit kitchen, and I smile indulgently as my mother sets badly burned grilled cheese in front of me, unsure whether I'm frustrated or glad that she decided to stay for a few extra days to spend some time with me and the kids.

"Don't you think so, Bella?" I hear her ask, looking at me pointedly, and I feel a brief moment of panic as I realize that not only do I not have any idea what she's said, but there is no way for me to even pretend that I do. After a long moment I settle for a noncommittal grunt before inspiration strikes and I stand, saying quickly,

"Mom, I've really got to check on the kids-"

"The kids are fine, Bella," she says dismissively, but as I look at her closely I realize this isn't just her being irresponsible- if she had been the one who suggested going to check on the kids now, I would have thought she was crazy, since they both just fell asleep for their afternoon nap- "Though honestly, I think Conner might be getting a bit old for naps," she adds, and I can tell that, as she's spoken without thinking as she immediately looks slightly chagrinned and blurts, "But either way, this is what I'm talking about. Are you really… _content_, Bella, just staying home with the kids all day?"

As I realize what she was talking about earlier I immediately regret my noncommittal grunt strategy as I say quickly, "Yeah, mom, I am. I know it must seem sort of like a waste of college tuition-"

She frowns slightly, looking uncomfortable like she always does when I mention how college was paid for. I think it's because most of the money somehow came from Phil, and she and he haven't been together for years now- but she shrugs and says, sounding sincere, "I never think about that," before continuing reluctantly, "But you're… _honestly_ happy in Forks, Bella?"

I open my mouth to blurt that I am, but then shut it, because that question is harder. Staying home with the kids is entirely my choice- there isn't a month that goes by that Jake doesn't ask me if I'm happy, if I'd rather be doing something else, and present me with ten different feasible ideas about what that something else could be. Actually, I think that once Elise is in preschool I'll probably go for my teaching certificate, but until then, I'm happy to be home.

But the truth is, Forks was never exactly my choice. Jake was my choice, and La Push and Forks were a necessary part of that choice. I don't know that I'd be happier somewhere else, but it would be a lie to say I don't ever wish for… variety, I suppose would be the word, something out of the ordinary-

But that wasn't Renee's question, and I'm able to answer honestly, "Yeah, mom, I am."

"If you're sure, Bella," she says, looking like she knows something I don't, and I open my mouth to respond that I _am_ sure-

But at that moment I hear a small rustling outside the window.

I look at my mom, trying to determine if she heard it too, but she's eating her sandwich, staring almost vacantly into space. "So," I say, deciding I must be imagining things yet again, "Are you excited to head home tomorrow?"

--

I giggle as Jake tackles me onto the bed, nuzzling my ear slightly with his cheek.

"No," I say halfheartedly, making an extremely feeble effort to roll out from under him as I protest unconvincingly "the kids-"

"Are asleep, and your mom is finally gone-"

But to my surprise as he says those words he rolls off of me, looking suddenly serious as he says, "Be careful during the day now that she's not here, Bels."

I can feel my brow furrow in confusion at his words, and he reaches over to push a strand of hair off my cheek, his hand warm and comforting as he elaborates. "There's a vampire in the area. The pack hasn't been able to locate him- or her- yet, but it's definitely out there."

I feel my confusion grow as I say slowly, "But- there haven't been any deaths reported-"

And now it's Jake's turn to look perplexed as he nods slowly. "No. There have been a few deer taken down, but no humans-"

As I meet his eyes I know we're both thinking the same thing, and as we both open our mouths, then close them, I also know that for whatever reason neither of us is going to say it.

"That's- unusual," I say instead before my brow furrows again, for a different reason, and I ask, unable to stop myself even though I know he won't like it, "You won't- _hurt_ him or her, will you Jacob? Not if they don't hunt people-"

His gaze darkens briefly, but then his hand reaches for mine and he shakes his head in the negative. "I don't think so. Right now we'd just like to talk to it, and then-" he shrugs, and I can tell he's contemplating his next words carefully. "Well, then it depends on what it says."

I nod slowly, knowing that's fair but unable to stop a little voice inside me that wants me to demand that Jacob _promise_ not to hurt the vampire-

The vampire who, in my head, has Edward's face.

--

I walk out onto my back porch, glad Charlie's taken the kids for the day since it gives me time to really think about the conversation Jacob and I had last night. Gives me time to think over some of the questions going through my head. Like why would a vampire hang around Forks for over a week? And could it really be a _coincidence_ that this vampire is a vegetarian?

I open my book to the first page and stare at it blankly, not even registering the words as I wonder, for the thousandth time, if it might be a Cullen- I know it's madness to think it could be Edward, when he made it clear exactly what he thought of this town and me- but maybe Alice, or Carlyle. They might miss Forks and just want to have a little visit-

_A little visit?_ I really must be losing it.

And just like that, the hairs on my arm are standing on end and I feel somehow colder, though nothing has changed.

I wonder if I'm imagining things, but then, somewhere just at the edges of my peripheral vision, I see a movement, too quick for my eyes to follow, but most definitely there.

I debate with myself for a long moment before standing up abruptly, filled with sudden _anger _that whoever or whatever is out there is doing this to me. As my book hits the deck with a dull thud and I rush inside, I resolve suddenly that I, Bella Black, am _not going to take this anymore _and I all but run to the hall closet and start throwing coats and various other debris out of it and onto the hallway floor until I reach what I want, at the very back- an unloaded rifle. I debate for a long moment about whether or not to put bullets into it before deciding there's no real point, since if I'm right it's not like the bullets would make a difference anyway, and if I'm wrong it doesn't change the fact that I have no clue how to actually use this thing and would be more likely to injure myself than anyone else.

Filled with conviction and fury not even I fully understand, I storm onto the deck, cocking the rifle and shouting melodramatically, "I know you're out there-" and though I don't know where it comes from, though I don't even think it's true, I hear myself saying with conviction, "Edward."

I instantly wish my face wasn't so easy to read, since if it somehow really is Edward there's no way he could possibly think I'm as sure as I sound- but then I remember, suddenly, that with him I have the upper hand, at least in this one small respect- he can't read my mind, and I with great effort I force my face to be calm as I shout again, "I _know_ you're out there Edward!" realizing belatedly that if anything, I probably just look and sound like a schizophrenic, pointing a gun at someone who doesn't exist-

"Come out here and speak to me this instant!" the voice that doesn't seem like it's coming from me demands, and I wish suddenly that my hands were free so that I could place them on my hips, that I could stomp my foot like a little girl about to have a temper tantrum. I belatedly realize the rifle is a stupid idea at best- to him I probably look how Elise looks to me when she's holding a doll- but somehow that only fuels my anger and I shout, "I swear to God, I'll shoot-" I look around frantically for something that he or someone else might care if I pointed a rifle at, but since the only choices seemed to be the ground, a swing, or my own house, I end up drawing a blank.

Of course, at that instant I trip and in my effort to catch myself my finger pulls the trigger of the gun-

Which, as it turns out, is very much loaded.

"Shit! Shit!!" I scream loudly, as the gun recoils and I fall to the ground as a result, wondering if I'm going to be deaf from something exploding that close to my ear.

And before I can think about it anymore, cold, strong arms are under me, lifting me gently to my feet even as an unnaturally smooth voice hisses angrily, "Are you hurt?"

I try to turn around to see him but he's holding me at just such an angle that I can't, and I know, without even needing to think about it, that it's deliberate. Just like that my anger is back full force, and I try to twist out of his arms.

Of course, being only human, I fail miserably, and am reduced to trying to kick him, frustrated when my kicks have no more impact than a feather would have banging against my own leg as he holds me, if anything, more tightly.

"Are you hurt?" he hisses again, and even though it's been over twelve years there is no forgetting that voice. Suddenly, inexplicably, all struggle leaves me and I go limp, hoping that I'm not going to do something truly humiliating like faint as I say weakly,

"No, I'm not hurt- Edward."

--

_Thoughts? I hope Bella wasn't too out of character when she 'lost it' at the end… thank you all so much for reading, and reviews make my day!_


	4. Checked In

The instant that I say I'm alright he releases me and I whirl to face him angrily, ready to let him have it-

But at the sight of his face, I'm struck speechless. Because his cool, exquisite beauty hasn't changed one bit in the time since I last saw him.

And, as I am suddenly and sharply aware, I have. Of course, I was never _beautiful_ at the best of times but now- I'm approaching middle age. I have wrinkles by my eyes. I feel physically ill as it occurs to me that given another five years I'll be able to pass for his mother- and then I flush as I wonder why that matters to me- it's not as though anyone is ever going to see us together. It's not as if I _want_ anyone to see us together-

And I suddenly feel sickness of a different kind as I remember Jacob- wonder how he's going to react to this-

I stumble slightly, feeling decidedly lightheaded as spots swim before my eyes, and for a moment I welcome the blackness that I'm sure is about to come.

But of course, I wouldn't be that lucky, and so quickly that I don't understand what's happening Edward has transported me back to my porch and I'm sitting down on the stairs with my head between my knees, wondering if there is any way for this to get worse.

After a few minutes, though, I feel well enough to look up to where Edward is surveying me with unnatural calm from several feet away. I feel sudden, sharp anger as I think about how easy this all is for him- it's not like he ever cared about me at all, he probably feels like this is all just some kind of- _chess game_ or something, and it just objectively waiting to see what his opponent does-

I shiver slightly at the thought of having him as my opponent, but then I square my shoulders, putting the thought from my mind as I say coolly, "Edward."

"Bella," he retorts, his voice almost too soft for me to hear it, and I fight a juvenile urge to snap something along the lines of 'That's Isabella to you', the unspoken words sounding ridiculous even to my own ears. I wonder briefly what the protocol for this type of situation might be- what does a married woman do when her vampire ex-boyfriend who she hasn't heard from in over a decade comes to call? Edward and I definitely aren't friends, or even acquaintances anymore- we just have a… history. An unfortunate, tense history of-

"I think it's up to you to talk," I say, thinking out loud, knowing that's a stupid idea since the only advantage I might hold over him is that he doesn't know what I'm thinking.

But unlike with Jacob, I have no idea what Edward's thinking either, and under different circumstances the irony might strike me as _funny-_ but there's nothing funny about this as we both stand there awkwardly, staring at one another.

"What are you thinking?" Edward asks suddenly, frustration in his own voice, and for one brief moment I wonder if it's possible that his thoughts mirror mine-

"What are you?" I counter roughly, not even caring that, if I'm honest with myself, I'm being the difficult one, at least at this moment-

"I'm thinking that I wish I knew what you were thinking," Edward says, voice impatient, and I feel my jaw drop slightly as I say,

"Oh," stupidly, before saying, even though it isn't the truth, or at least, it wasn't until I wondered what a logical person would want to know at a moment like this, "Mostly I'm wondering what you're doing here."

His jaw tightens and his mouth thins and I shrink backwards slightly at the thought that I've somehow made him angry as he bites out, "I'm wondering that myself."

Another endless silence follows, and I have to roll my eyes at the stupidity of the situation before I say slowly, "No, you must be here for a reason. Is- everyone alright? Your family I mean? Is Alice-"

"My family and I parted ways several years ago," Edward cuts me off coolly, his tone not inviting discussion, certainly not inviting questions, buy questions are all that fill my mind as I rise to my feet, wishing that I could think of a really pertinent, intelligent question- something that would show him I'm not just the stupid girl he left-

But all I can say, stupidly, is "I don't understand," and it's no surprise when he makes no move to explain. I'm already wondering if it's possible that the silent tension between us will stretch on until Charlie brings the kids back- Edward is eying me warily, occasionally averting his gaze as though he finds something offensive, and I wonder if it's possible, even after all this time, that he hungers for my blood. The thought seems fantastical now- bizarre, impossible- really the whole situation seems impossible, and I keep expecting at any moment to wake up-

His voice unexpectedly slices through my reverie and I feel my chin jerk slightly upward as he asks, softly, again seeming almost, inexplicably, angrily,

"You've been happy?" the question somehow sounding more like a statement as his eyes narrow murderously.

_Happy._ I contemplate the word for an endless moment, but all it evokes are fairytales- a world full of people young enough to believe that everything will work out just exactly how you want it to in the end, just as long as you're a good person and love someone enough-

"_Content_," I bite out, unable to look at him as I say the word, and instead focusing intently on my feet. "I've been content."

Most people wouldn't have understood, but I can tell, even without looking at him, that Edward understands both instantly and completely, and out of the very corner of my eye I see his scowl deepen- and then he almost seems to hesitate, as if the very idea of Edward experiencing a moment of anything resembling uncertainty weren't laughable.

I realize belatedly that I should probably counter with some question of my own… perhaps something along the lines of _so, hunted any tasty mountain lions lately, Edward?_

But even thinking it makes me flush and so I'm relieved as he comments stiffly, "Your home is lovely."

I fight the sudden and bizarre urge to laugh at his banal, carefully controlled statement before forcing myself to retort, with almost supernatural calm, "Thank you."

"Conner is five now?" he asks, almost as though he's trying to fill the silence, as if it could matter to someone like him whether it's silent or not-

"Yes," I retort automatically, somehow managing to keep the unnaturally cool note in my voice. "He turned five last-" and suddenly something clicks into place in my head and my eyes flash up to meet his before I ask blankly, more confused than angry even as I try to make my voice harsh, "How do you know my son's name?" I feel my brow furrow and despite myself a tiny thought crosses my mind that I really should stop doing that, since it's only going to give me more wrinkles as I continue, louder, "How do you know how old he is?"

And Edward has the nerve to look at me as though _I'm _the crazy one before saying incredulously, almost as though he's talking to someone who's Conner's age, "Surely you can't think I haven't checked in on you from time to time."

"Why the hell would I have any reason to think you checked in on me from time to time?" I demand loudly, hearing my voice take on a slightly hysterical note and not caring as I place my hands on my hips, wishing more than anything that I could punch him as I continue, "In fact, if that's even true, why the hell did you? It's not like you care about me. It's not like I care about you. I don't even know you. You don't know me-"

"No," Edward interrupts me, and again his voice is like ice. "You certainly don't know me."

I have enough time to wonder what the hell that's supposed to mean, but not enough time to think up a stinging retort as I hear a car pulling into the driveway.

I look to Edward quickly, but he seems just as surprised as I am, and I wonder if he's lost his touch as Jake's car pulls up in front of us and I brace myself for whatever is about to come.

--

_Thanks so much for reading/ Reviews are more treasured than you can know!_

_Also, I re-uploaded this due to two fairly major typos.... this is what comes of posting at 3 am. Major apologies to anyone who was notified about it twice, it will not happen again.  
_


	5. Ravisssant

Jacob gets out of his car quickly, looking first at me, then at Edward, and I brace myself for the inevitable explosion- it's been years since Jake and I have talked about Edward or his family, but Jake never exactly hesitated to make his feelings known-

"You okay, Bels?" Jacob asks, and out of the corner of my eye I see Edward flinch as Jake says my name, though I'm not exactly sure why-

"Yeah, I'm fine," I reply, not sure whether I'm surprised or not by the fact that I actually mean it, at least mostly. "Edward and I were just-" I struggle for a moment, trying to figure out what to say, before I finish pathetically, anticlimactically, "catching up."

Jacob drags his gaze from me back to Edward, and again I brace myself for some kind of confrontation-

But all Jacob does is nod once, curtly, and say, his voice kind of unwelcoming, but not angry, "Cullen."

"Black," Edward retorts, and for a split second I think I see amusement flash through his amber eyes before they go blank, complimenting his hard face. Despite this, though, I find that I somehow can't stop wondering what caused his momentary amusement- what Jacob was thinking that struck Edward as funny, or if it was somehow the use of his last name-

"We thought it might be one of you," Jacob continues, voice still rough, but not unkind as he approaches us, and I suddenly wonder just how much the tribe has been talking about the situation- if the reason that Jake is being so calm is that he's following some sort of direct orders, or protocol-

"I'm glad to be able to set your mind at ease," Edward says stiffly, formally, with an almost ridiculous nod of his head, and I wonder if he's responding to Jacob's words or to something that Jake is thinking, since somehow his response doesn't seem to quite _fit_, at least not with what I'm hearing-

"Are you alone?" Jacob asks, and Edward hesitates before nodding, just once, almost as though uncertain of how much he wants to give away.

"I am."

Jacob nodes too then, in that same bizarre, abrupt way that Edward's been utilizing, before saying, "The tribe would very much like to speak with you," and though the words are themselves a request, his tone doesn't seem to allow much room for protest.

Edward hesitates before saying briefly, definitely, "I'm not sure there's a need for that. I plan to leave as soon as possible." Suddenly, unfathomably, he looks at me, and I flush despite myself, since somehow, even after all this time, no caress could ever be more intimate than the look he gives me- as though he's seeing through me, into my soul, where I keep the part of myself that is… well, uniquely _Edward's_… the part of myself that will always be Edward's, though it's hidden- at least, most of the time- "Tonight, if possible," he elaborates shortly, and I feel my flush deepen, but this time it's in anger- that even after all this time I could so thoroughly misunderstand him-

But his gaze has moved away from me, and Jacob and he are suddenly staring one another down, seeming to war with their eyes.

"I understand," Edward says shortly in response to something I can't hear, and I almost want to scream in frustration, demand what Jacob is conveying to him-

And somehow Edward must have conveyed something to Jacob too, or maybe Jacob just understands something that I don't- or misunderstands something that I don't, who can really tell anymore as Jake turns to me and says lightly,

"Conner and Elise are with Charlie?"

I nod, surprised at the question and briefly wonder how Edward told him that before remembering that actually, it was me who told him that this morning and I almost want to slam my head against a wall in frustration before I force myself to answer, hoping I sound even remotely normal, "Yeah, he should be bringing them back around five."

"Why don't I go get them?" Jake says, and I feel my jaw drop open without my consent as I process his words, before I progress to staring at him stupidly-

But he doesn't give me much time to think about it as he walks over to me and kisses my cheek casually before turning and getting back into the car, saying "See you in half an hour" before smiling at me and giving Edward a warning look all in the same instant.

I barely register the car driving off before Edward bites out, eyes slightly amused again for some reason I can't understand, "Either he's more perceptive than I thought, or he wants to torture me."

"Probably both," I snap back unkindly before I take time to contemplate his words and feel sharp confusion as to what he could mean- torture him about what? And why would Jake leave me here alone with Edward to begin with-

And he's scrutinizing me so intensely that it makes me uncomfortable, and I feel myself blushing again, hating my traitorous body for more reasons than one as I wonder what he can possibly be thinking about what he sees- how old I must look to him now-

"What are you thinking?" he asks me for the second time today, but now his voice is gentler somehow, almost like a caress. The tone, more than anything, is what catches me off guard, is what causes me to blurt out, when I'd had no intention of telling him anything at all,

"I'm wondering how I look to you."

One of his perfect eyebrows quirks upward, and his gaze narrows slightly before he looks angry again, but somehow, instinctually, I know that this time the anger is directed toward something or someone that is not me as his eyes flash up to meet mine and he murmurs softly, looking suddenly, inexplicable less… sculpted than usual-

"Ravissant."

I blink, knowing my mouth is probably open cluelessly again, since I have no idea what language the word is from, much less what it means- and once again I'm reminded sharply, painfully, of why he left- why I was never going to be good enough for someone like Edward, even if the way he went about it was cruel- unworthy of him-

But his gaze is far away now, and he continues softly, seeming totally unaware of my confusion, almost unaware of my_ presence_ "I've watched women age over the years, and I always suspected you wouldn't reach the height of your beauty until the age of thirty, or even thirty-five, but to _see_ it-"

I blink in confusion, not understanding what he's saying for a minute- wondering if it's possible that he's saying I look- well, _good_, and if so why he would bother to lie, now of all times-

"Edward," I squeak, not meaning to say anything but somehow unable to help myself from calling him on his obvious lie "I'm old enough to be your _mother_!"

And suddenly his face is hard again and I realize belatedly that, like me, he hadn't meant to say anything to begin with- and a traitorous little voice in the back of my mind wonders if that makes what he said true- before I discount my fantastical thinking, snapping back to reality with a dull thud.

"No, Bella," he hisses venomously, "I'm old enough to be YOUR great great-great-great-great-great grandfather." He shakes his head, and for an instant I'm frightened, but he just continues, voice almost sad, "But then, I suppose you would see it that way. I should have suspected that even you would-"

And then he stops, turning away from me just when he's about to say something _real_, and even though I'm pretty sure I wasn't going to like whatever it was, I still want to scream at the fact that he stopped.

"Even I would what?" I challenge, hands on my hips as I stomp toward him, reaching out and grabbing his arm to turn him toward me even as I know that me attempting to move Edward is like an ant attempting to move a house-

And I realize a split second too late that touching him is a mistake as a shudder goes through my body at the first, slight contact and a warm feeling spreads from the pit of my stomach, radiating outward despite the fact that his arm is unnaturally cold-

But before I can even enjoy it he yanks away, hissing, "That even you would succumb to the petty, mundane, _inaccurate_ way that your species looks at things. _You_ too old for _me-"_ he laughs, but there is no mirth in it at all, and a shudder of a different kind wracks through me as I wonder what's about to happen now-

"I didn't mean it like that," I snap, even as I wonder what the hell he's trying to get at here. "What are you even talking about? What does it matter if you're seventeen or five hundred and thirty? You're still just Edward." _And you still look like a God._

For a second he looks like I've slapped him, but I don't have any idea why before he seems to pull himself together, face going stoic again.

"And what does it matter if you're seventeen or fifty, then?" he counters sharply. "By your own logic, you're still just Bella."

"It's different," I mutter after a long moment, looking downward, not sure how to explain to someone who will never age what I mean- how I feel-

"It certainly is," he replies piercingly, his voice almost cruel, and I still just _don't _understand what he's getting at here. Obviously I wasn't enough to tempt him even when I was in my prime- does he need to rub my age in my face?

"Screw this," I mutter, so softly that in the same situation Jacob wouldn't have heard me, but I know Edward does, and I feel a brief flash of triumph as he flinches slightly before I try to whirl around melodramatically and storm off in the opposite direction-

But evidently fate won't even allow me to be graceful for the fifteen seconds it would take me to make my way into the house as I trip over one of Conner's trucks and fall backwards-

And right into Edward's cold, marble chest.

His arm reaches out instinctually, almost before I even start to fall, and he catches me tightly against him, trying to minimize my fall. For a long instant neither of us moves, and I'm painfully aware that my breathing is shallow as I stiffen against him before he turns me around, obviously meaning to let go of me-

But he can't even manage that much as the motion causes me to trip again, and my hands land against his chest as I reach out to steady myself-

And then the last thing I'm thinking about is my painful lack of balance. Actually, I'm not even breathing anymore as I feel sudden, sharp awareness rush through my body and I wait for him to pull away, both wishing that he would and somehow hoping that he won't as I feel him shiver- but it doesn't make any sense, because vampires don't _shiver_-

A million thoughts rush through my head, some more coherent than others- how creepy I am, really, to still be attracted to him when he looks like a teenager- how wrong it is, separate from any of this, that I'm this strongly attracted to anyone who isn't my husband- my husband who I love-

"Bella," I hear him whisper, and my eyes flutter shut as I allow my lips to push gently against his, feeling suddenly like I'm in a trance-

But before I can even register what's happening, before I'm even certain of whether my lips have connected with his or not, Edward shoves me roughly away, and I feel myself flying across the deck before landing _hard _against the house.

Edward looks appalled, though whether it's at the fact that I actually tried to _ kiss _ him or some unknown other variable is a mystery to me, and I find myself wishing he had shoved me harder- something, _anything_ that might prevent me from thinking about what an idiot I am-

"Well, it looks like I'm just in time," a gorgeous, high-pitched voice sounds from somewhere to my left, sounding almost _amused, _as though there were anything to find funny here_- _and I feel my head whirl in time with Edwards, and the world seems to spin beneath me as Edward and I question at the same time, disbelief in both our voices,

"Alice?" before everything goes dark.

--

_I'm feeling that a lot of people are going to think Jacob was OOC at the beginning. All I can really say is- I think it's important to keep in mind that this is Jacob at 28, having spent more than 10 years of his life with Bella. He IS wary of Edward, and he is angry at him to some degree for what he did to Bella all those years ago, but there is no real reason for the kind of jealousy or competitiveness found in the Twilight series- at least not that Jacob knows of, yet._

_And so- why is Alice there? What is Bella going to do? Forget Bella, what is EDWARD going to do? All this and more- next time :)_

_Comments and reviews are treasured and truly do inspire me to write faster._


	6. Control

The first thing I feel is that I'm very, incredibly _warm_, almost enveloped in comfort.

"-always told you-_" _I hear Alice's voice as though from very far away, before Edward cuts her off sharply, definitely, voice as hard as I've ever heard it,

"You have no idea what you're talking about, Alice-"

"So what now?" she fires back, and I can't remember petite, gentle Alice ever talking quite so forcefully before. "You leave again? Come back once a year for the next ten years before you can't stand it anymore and have to talk to her again? Screw what it's doing to _you_, Edward, have you ever stopped to think- _really_ think, objectively, about what you've done to her? What it's going to do to her eventually when-"

I hear a chair fly backwards, the sound of wood cracking as he hisses something too low for me to hear before growling, though I'm positive she hasn't said anything else, "That will _never_ happen, Alice."

"I know what I see," she replies after a long moment, voice far, far calmer than his, "And even after all this time, you're still just postponing the inevitable. Nothing has changed since she was seventeen, and nothing you can do will change that, as though the past week wasn't enough to demonstrate _that._ There are only two ways for it to happen, at least on your end. Either you _will _make her one of us, or you'll kill her. It's just a matter of which and when."

I don't even have time to process the words before the blackness surrounds me again.

--

"**No!" **I hear two voices thunder simultaneously as I slowly struggle to consciousness again, and I wonder what on earth could inspire Edward and Jacob to actually agree on something.

"Well, maybe that Bella's awake now, she'd like to offer an opinion herself," Alice suggest glibly, and I feel caught off guard and oddly embarrassed as I blink, raising up from the couch and able to feel a furious blush on my face as I blurt out the first thing that comes to mind, not caring how out of place the question might sound in the tension of the room.

"Where are the kids, Jake?"

"Playing outside," he near growls, not even bothering to turn to face me from where he stands, sending a death glare at Alice- a death glare that Edward seems determined to outdo as he stares at his own sister, murder in his eyes.

"They must be hungry," I offer, knowing that I'm not helping the situation any, but unsure how I should act, what I should say-

"Your dad fed them," Jake bites out in that same tone of voice, so different from any he has ever used with me, and I suppress a shiver as I struggle to understand what's going on.

"Hi, Bella," Alice says suddenly, smiling at me, that same warm, genuine smile I remember from before, when things were infinitely simpler, and also somehow more complicated, and before I can even realize what's happening she's leapt forward gracefully and is hugging me tightly. I can't help but let out a small laugh at her enthusiasm as she says warmly, "I missed you," and I say, without needing to think about it at all,

"I missed you too Alice," sending her a genuine smile as she pulls back slightly and grabs my hands.

"Do you mind if we go somewhere else to talk?" she inquires, looking suddenly nervous for reasons I don't understand, and I start to nod even as Edward and Jacob bark, once again, miraculously, in agreement,

"**No!**," both stepping toward us in a way that might have been menacing if it wasn't also so oddly _comical._

Alice looks slightly nervous, but with one more look at the two men I feel suddenly, _sharply_ indignant as I snap, hands on my hips, "_Excuse _me? Who _asked _you?" before squeezing Alice's hands lightly and asking, "Where would you like to go?"

"You will leave this house over my dead body," my husband _snarls _at her before turning his attention to me and hissing, "So help me god, Bels, if I have to physically restrain you I will."

"What?" I blurt, blinking at him in confusion, too surprised to really think about why he might be saying that. In all this time, Jacob has never, _ever_ threatened me, directly or indirectly, in any way- has never tried to control my movements, directly or indirectly, in any way-

"If necessary I'll help," Edward pipes up from somewhere behind Jacob and I feel anger at the fact that they're doing this to me, now of all times.

"I just bet you will," I snap harshly before turning so I can't see them and focusing on Alice. "Is it okay if you just tell me here? Evidently they've decided to go all _cavemen _on my ass."

And to my continued surprise, Alice looks like she's going to cry- in fact, if Vampires could cry, I'm sure she _would_ be crying as she near-whimpers, sounding nowhere near as self possessed as she usually is, "Oh Bella, I'm in so much trouble."

"What, for coming here?" I hear myself ask blankly, unable to think of another reason why Alice- beautiful, perfect Alice, might think she's in trouble. "Alice, don't worry about that! Edward will get over it eventually, and, I mean, I don't think Jake's mad so much as surprised, like I am-"

"No, I- I came to see you about something else. I wasn't even sure Edward would still be here, and I can't see Jacob, so I had no idea how he'd react."

And for some reason my stomach sinks as I start to realize that whatever she's about to say is the reason Jake and Edward are acting so crazy- that whatever it is can't possibly be good-

"Bella," Alice interrupts my thoughts, looking down at her feet nervously, "I really, really need a favor."

"Alice, anything!" I cry, unable to believe she could be this nervous about asking me for something. "You know I think of you as a sister- nothing could change that-"

"**No!**" both Edward and Jacob cry out in unison again, and Alice shoots me a wary smile before saying softly,

"I think you should let me finish first, Bella."

I open my mouth to protest that she doesn't have to, but something about the sheer desperation in Jacob's tone gives me pause, so I just nod instead, waiting for her to continue.

"The Volturi have Jasper," she blurts out suddenly, and I wrack my brain, almost positive I've heard the term before, but utterly unable to place it. "And- I need your help to get him some information."

"The- what?" I ask, knowing I sound like an idiot again and unable to help it as I fail to make sense of anything she's saying- what has Jasper? And how on Earth can _I_ help her with this-

"Sort of like Vampire royalty," Jacob bites out bitterly from somewhere behind me. "At least if I'm to understand this right."

Something else half-clicks in my head but again I can't place it, so I sigh, saying softly,

"I'm- sorry, Alice, but I don't really see how I can help. I mean- I'm just- _normal._"

"Aro won't see it that way," Edward says bleakly, voice almost _wooden_, and I fight the urge to scream as I snap,

"Who's Aro? What are you all _talking _about? How can I possibly help you? I mean- you're vampires, they're vampires- I don't get what the problem is. If Jasper wants to leave this- Vampire royalty, can't he just- well, _go?_"

And to my amazement it's Edward who speaks. "No. They want Alice. He's the best leverage they could hope to find, and they know it."

"Want Alice?" I blurt in continued confusion. "Want her for what?"

And somehow it's become Edward who I'm talking to as he bites out harshly, "Her ability."

_Abiltiy? _It takes me longer than it should to figure out that he means the way that she can read minds, and I nod, still not understanding how this involves me.

"They've wanted Alice for years. They wouldn't mind having me, either, but since my… _ability_ is similar to Aro's, they're not quite as desperate-"

"Desperate for _what?" _ I cry out in real frustration. "And what do you want me to do?"

Again, Edward and Jacob are bellowing in unison- or at least Jake is bellowing, while Edward merely hisses, "Nothing."

And with that I turn back to Alice, saying softly. "And- you? What do you want me to do?"

And Alice looks as nervous as I've ever seen her, which I don't really understand, since she must know one way or another, what I'm going to say-

"The thing is, Bella- the Volturi are looking for a new human secretary. Or at least- they will be in three days. And I was wondering if you might be willing to go and help me get Jasper out -"

I look at her like she's crazy for a long moment before saying hesitantly, "Alice, you know if I could help you I would, but, I mean, wouldn't it be better to send Carlisle to negotiate or something? I just don't think they'd be into having a klutzy middle aged human work for them-"

"They would," Alice says with impossible certainty before looking hesitant again, and whispering, "But I understand that- you probably wouldn't want to go. It's really selfish of me to ask you-"

And I can feel my heart constrict as I hear Conner laugh outside and realize I can't- it would be irresponsible, and wrong, to leave my children on some wild goose chase for Jasper-"

"Yes it is," Jacob says loudly from behind me before I can speak and suddenly the words I was going to speak are drowned out by my fury at how Edward, as usually, seems to think he can dictate my actions- that Jacob is somehow getting that idea too-

"She can't do it, Alice," Edward says from behind me, sounding mostly tired, and Jacob pipes up,

"I won't _let_ her-"

"The hell I can't!" I snap, not even thinking about the consequences of my words as I gaze at Alice intently. "I'm ON this. Now tell me what to do."

--

_Reviews are SOOOOO treasured, you have no idea! Thanks for reading :)_


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